I have heard it said that a sacrifice it is not a sacrifice if it does not hurt. If you are not losing something in the act of sacrifice, if you do not feel it, then you are probably not making a sacrifice. This thought rolls around in my head often. Late one night, being eluded by sleep, I found myself flipping through the channels. A couple times through the channels (no easy task these days) and I come across a movie called, Freedom Writers. Next to a bad action movie this is the perfect discovery at two in the morning.
Freedom Writers is about a young woman named Erin Gruwell (played by Academy Award winner Hilary Swank) who is a new teacher and newly-wedded wife, still finding her way in life. Her journey begins in a classroom full of inner-city kids who have been branded as "problems" and "hopeless." This classroom is full of youth who are unruly, physically displaced, and culturally lost. As a new teacher she takes on this classroom and has no idea how to handle them. There is nothing in any book written about the "how-to's" of teaching that could prepare a teacher for such an experience.
This particular cohort of students was deemed to be a group that would be impossible to educate. "Just get them to pass through to the next grade" was the objective this young teacher was given. She found it unethical, irresponsible, and without compassion. This group of students knew why they were in this particular classroom and they didn't trust this teacher any more than they trusted any other. She didn't know how to get the students to respond. In her effort to help these kids she decided to cross the boundaries of the student/teacher relationship and offer the students trust. She handed out notebooks and explained that they only need to write in them whatever they were feeling or thinking. If they wanted to they could leave them in a cabinet in the back and she would read them. She didn't expect any of them would leave a notebook, which is why she was not prepared to open the cabinet and find so many left for her to read.
This reminds me of several conversations I had with a friend based on the notion that the greeting "How are you doing?" has come to mean very little, and certainly nothing more than "Hi." This greeting has basically been reduced to another form of "Hello." The intention is not to find out how someone is doing. But what if someone responded with something more than a "Good, and you?" What if that person said, "I am not doing so great. I feel worthless and alone."? Would the person asking, "How are you?" be prepared for such a response?
This is precisely where Erin Gruwell finds herself. She has come face to face with the response, "I am not doing so well. I feel worthless and alone." Now, what is she supposed to do with this? Her answer: a deeper commitment. She purchases the students books that the school will not, sacrificing whatever pittance is left from her meager salary. She arranges fieldtrips for the class paid for by taking a second job. Through these students she begins to find herself and her approach as a teacher. And at the same time she was helping them discover that they were worth listening to. She was giving them a voice. In the process, she also finds out that her husband cannot live with her decisions and does not want to play second to her endeavors. He leaves her. She feels her sacrifice.
This is not an extremely profound movie and the cinematic devices are rudimentary, which probably work best in this situation. This movie is not even a new storyline (Dangerous Minds, Fighting the Odds, Wildcats, The Principal, Sister Act) but the message is clear and should be deeply absorbed - Change takes commitment and commitment involves sacrifice and sacrifice hurts.
